Today.

today is officially the best day i've had in 22 days.

(:

.

.let's get crunk.

..and lose control

Peace

x

Woot.

I've Never Had Such a Strong Bond With Anyone Before.

I'm so glad to have you back in my life.

I Don' Give A Shit What The Others Will Say/Think. Its Not They're Choice Tbh.

I Need To Grow Some Balls, And Stand Up For What I Want, No Just Pretend To Want What Others Want For Me Because It's "Whats Best."

They Can Tell Me I'm Making A Mistake, But I Don't Care. All they Can Do Then, Is Hope For My Sake, That I Learn From My Mistakes This Time.

.

so nothings really changed since yesterday. im happier by a mile. but still feeling the same about that particular someone.

someone told me yesterday that i should tell him how i feel, and ask for a second chance.
i think about this, and its a good idea, and i want to do it.
i mean, what have i got to lose?
plus i think it'd give me more closure on the 'us' thing (provided he tells me he's not interested.)

but honestly, i don't have the balls to tell him. how can i say it? where can i say it? when can i say it?
theres just too many details that are too imperfect.

so i probably do what i do best.
stay in the background, and not go after what my heart truly desires,
and end up blogging about it all.

I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE

everytime i see you, it puts a smile on my face, my body fills with warmth.
but when you walk straight past, its a cruel, cold reminder that your not mine.

today was the first time we've properly spoken since back then, nearly a month ago.
i had you alone for 2 minutes.
back then, whenever we got the chance, even if it were only 30 seconds, they'd still be 30 seconds filled with passion, and laughter, and sheer happiness.

those two minutes were nice. a civilised conversation, then like you always do, you left.

everytime i see you, another part of me dies inside, it's killing me slowly.

so after a two minute conversation, you can imagine the emotional train wreck i am right now.

sad as in pathetic.

is it sad that i look out for you at school, just to see you walk by because you put a smile on my face?
is it sad that when i get home, i go on my computer and write stupid blogs on you?
is is sad that i look at photos of you, of us, just to see your perfect smile some more?
is it sad that i go to bed everynight, and just lie there thinking of you?
is it sad how i hate girls that you try "get into", when your the one that tried, not them?

is it sad, to still love you?

Valentines Day.

Today Was Amazing. I Love my Mates All So Much.

I Now Know That Valentines Day Doesnt Restrict You To Just Celebrating Love With Your Partner, But Friends Too.

I Have A Good Feeling About A Lot Of Things Now.